October 2011
26 posts
So, no one on here is going to be able to give me a good recommendation on a hotel in Bangkok, right?
http://t.co/yS7TkGqQ What are those? Beads or cookies?
I guess it’s normal, but seriously effed up —> http://t.co/YdbfJIAW. Marketing. It works.
Twitter, I do not want to follow the Worcester cops. Not only do I live in Texas, I’ve no desire to be verbally assaulted.
Zooey Deschanel Show: “I was a weird girl & got to dress in these 1950’s frocks, & then a boy fell in love with me.” http://t.co/iQslClFB
Compost is great. What’s not great is lifting a giant, greasy, very heavy tub of brewpub compost over your head and shaking it.
Yeah, the foie gras ban seems misguided. In terms of animal cruelty and environmental pollution in actual numbers, this is a small problem.
It makes me feel like I work in a disco Gap. And not in the good way. Here is the song. http://t.co/ZWtQz0eI. I’m not helping.
RT @wildflagmusic: Our album is on sale today at Amazon for $3.99. Make your coffee at home and buy some music instead. #supersale #chea …
RT @Lucky_Kristin: Proof of the disappearing American middle class. This frightens me just a bit: http://t.co/fvJmt77H
Seasonal gourd likes to party. http://t.co/lHdSTaSf
I just spent $23 on a leg of lamb. This shit better taste better than corndogs…
RT @THIRSTY_PLANET: It’s Pint Night @blackstarcoop Monday! We’ll have free TP pint glasses for the first 75 or so pints!
Okay, it’s already not funny to live tweet this. Ow. My heart.
Hanging out with Bill Murray is still on my to-do list in life. Awesome interview = http://t.co/WNmRiw0b
Officially addicted to Battlestar Galactica. Earned a new badge in Nerd Scouts.
RT @SamuelLJackson: Can-a muh fukkasay fuck on here?
All I really want out of life is a Leif Erickson day.
I am currently sitting in my room with three different colors of hair dye running down my arm because apparently it’s pretend it’s 2003 day.
3 years without him seeing my feces is a pretty good run. Let’s focus on the positive. Related: I want to die right now.
#occupyaustin http://t.co/0Yp45e1U
RT @MisaPantS: Oh shit Im standing next to a pooka shell necklace… But still #OccupyAustin
RT @BexActionNews: Scene outside Austin City Hall; crowd expected to grow after 5 p.m. #OccupyAustin http://t.co/4WeyzRlC
There is NOTHING better than cracking open a fresh Lonely Planet guide. NOTHING.
How to spend at Sunday: bake biscuits, hike around for a while, drink beer (Petrus). http://t.co/M6NPvy5d http://t.co/jJnlCyiN
Good combo: Belgian Yeti and dark chocolate.
September 2011
2 posts
Does YOUR boyfriend actively work on improving his vocal impression of your Dad?
Everyday, people come in to the brewpub and ask for gluten free bread for their beer-soaked pulled pork sandwich while drinking wheat beer.
August 2011
5 posts
I didn’t even notice my 4,000th tweet because I was too busy complaining about them damn hippies at Barton. #sadtrombone
Scenic view of Lamar… @ Shalimar Apartments http://t.co/IwKCHxa
Hybrid Moments before another long ass shift!
Heard radio segment on Greek yogurt demographics while eating the same. Apparently I’m a wealthy, educated, Starbucksey East coaster.
Whenever I see that someone has facebooked, emailed or tweeted via their phone, I also suspect pooping. Related: wash your hands, people!
July 2011
10 posts
“You know how I always wanted a cat with no legs so that it slithers around? It would be so cute. That’s what seals are like.”
Myspace = Greyjoys #gameofthrones
Um…there is a show called Dance Moms. I feel like this should be the new bonding activity for my Dad and I.
RT @andrewdboggs: I hate my touch screen phone. My old rotary phone had plenty of notches for my penis.
RT @jtoungate: @siouxzen I don’t want read about you eating chicken fried rice, I want to read about you eating bugs, pigs ears, and wha …
Summer 2011 Sky Mall is a raging disappointment. All sports memorabilia, storage solutions and laser hair regrowth helmets.
The owner of this place just complimented my looks, which makes me feel funny in my brain—the part that thinks. http://t.co/zGyqcQ6
I know it’s probably TMI to constantly talk about uterus issues, but I would pay good money for a decent fallopian relaxer right now.
Can everyone just tell me right now whether or not Google+ is going to happen? #ThingsGoogleHasInCommonWithCoco
No, my uterus is taking my whole body hostage thru an estrogen-filled cramp ride. RT @sneakysouthpaw: @siouxzen uh-oh is someone preggo?
January 2011
9 posts
JFAKASMS made a sex tape when he was 19, but says it’s horrible. I’d prefer that this one remain private. Awkward teen JFAKASMS is no good.
RT @theshmeeg: @siouxzen if it makes manslave feel better, JFAKASM kind of looks like J fake-asm, as in fake orgasm.
I am bad at social media.
I think I’m a belieber for JFAKASMS (James Franco AKA Sub-Manslave)
RT @ChardSwissnym: @siouxzen Add the suffix “AKA Sub-Manslave” whenever discussing Franco, or abbreviate him to JFAKASMS.
Why is the girl from True Grit nominated for a Supporting Oscar? She narrated the whole movie. It was about HER story! #confused
Basically I’m a super hero.
